That basicly the point of the thread
Dora the explorer going around the world conquering the various lesser race of the world for them own good and selling them for slavery as they can't take care of themself
The Worst Children's TV Shows Never Made
- Thread starter David bar Elias
- Start date
That basicly the point of the thread
Dora the explorer going around the world conquering the various lesser race of the world for them own good and selling them for slavery as they can't take care of themself
I just had the idea for a TV show the more obnoxious Young Earth crowd would like.
Basically the premise is that a bunch of American Young Earth Creationists (YEC) go roaming the world trying to find scientific evidence for a worldwide flood, the young age of the Earth (6-10K years), etc. but must contend with a supervillain team of "Darwinists" (who are probably French or from the American North or California) knowingly or unknowingly in league with Satan trying to thwart them.
In my "Afrikaner TL," I'm trying to come up with a pop culture for the Afrikaner Confederation and I suspect that given the Confederate origin of some of them, you'd have some ugly romanticization of the antebellum South, plus given my timeline's WWII, you'd have some really heavy-handed bashing of the Japanese, Soviets, and Qing Chinese, as well as the British and Americans (allies against the Soviets and their minions, but treacherous and with their own agendas).
Basically the premise is that a bunch of American Young Earth Creationists (YEC) go roaming the world trying to find scientific evidence for a worldwide flood, the young age of the Earth (6-10K years), etc. but must contend with a supervillain team of "Darwinists" (who are probably French or from the American North or California) knowingly or unknowingly in league with Satan trying to thwart them.
In my "Afrikaner TL," I'm trying to come up with a pop culture for the Afrikaner Confederation and I suspect that given the Confederate origin of some of them, you'd have some ugly romanticization of the antebellum South, plus given my timeline's WWII, you'd have some really heavy-handed bashing of the Japanese, Soviets, and Qing Chinese, as well as the British and Americans (allies against the Soviets and their minions, but treacherous and with their own agendas).
Depressame Street: An Emotized version of Seasame Street, horribly depressing and taken off the air 20 seconds in.
Actual Highschool: An unedited, undramatised look at highschool. It runs for 20 years and does not skimp on the stuff we dont want to see. It sickens parents, traumatises kids and becomes the most watched show in America. The after-affect is stricter anti-bullying laws, cliques are forced to be disbanded the moment they start up.
Bully Hunter: Public Access show where local school bullies are sent to a deserted island with a 8 hour headstart of their captors, on dryland there are Columbian mercenaries and hungry lions ready to hunt them down... And in the water, a personal favorte. Sharks with laser beams on their heads.
Admin: Cops that go after Spammers and Trollers and taser them till they are fried.
Actual Highschool: An unedited, undramatised look at highschool. It runs for 20 years and does not skimp on the stuff we dont want to see. It sickens parents, traumatises kids and becomes the most watched show in America. The after-affect is stricter anti-bullying laws, cliques are forced to be disbanded the moment they start up.
Bully Hunter: Public Access show where local school bullies are sent to a deserted island with a 8 hour headstart of their captors, on dryland there are Columbian mercenaries and hungry lions ready to hunt them down... And in the water, a personal favorte. Sharks with laser beams on their heads
.Admin: Cops that go after Spammers and Trollers and taser them till they are fried.
I can't believe no one has mentioned Gali the Alligator yet.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOETlkc_nNY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOETlkc_nNY
I am sure Stephen Colbert would be in favour of this type of entertainment.
Jahiliyya
(D/NL/B/ES 2005-08)
This Endemol reality-TV format (successfully sold to Sky and MSNBC) is an unusually capital-intensiove variant of the genre, often costing more per minute to make than regular features. Its great popularity, however, repaid the investment. Jahiliyya selects a child or youth from a tribal, relatively primitive background and simulates divine inspiration through a mixture of high technology, psychoactive drugs and hypnotic programming. The show then follows the adventures of their newly minted prophet for the rest of the season, occasionally providing miracles or prophecy the plot requires.
A typical season explores the life and enviropnment of the candidate for the first two oer three episodes before inducing prophecy. The remainder of the season is dedicated to the birth of the new religion.
Jahiliyya
Season 1 (2005) followed the misadventures of a 13-year-old Yanaoma girl in the Rio Xingu reservation. Filming began in 2003, but the format proved more time-intensive than expected.
Season 2 (2006) selected a KhoiKhoi boy of 14, but had to abandon the experiment when he was threatened with death and expelled from the tribe. They followed his adventures in the desert, providing miraculous suirvival aids.
Season 3 (2007) featured a Pushtu boy from Pakistan's NWFP. The candidate was killed.
Season 4 will depart from the established mould by selecting a 15-year-old member of an urban gang in Mumbai.
Season 5 is advertised as featuring a Naga girl. Early preview trailers suggest she may suffer a form of ordeal.
(D/NL/B/ES 2005-08)
This Endemol reality-TV format (successfully sold to Sky and MSNBC) is an unusually capital-intensiove variant of the genre, often costing more per minute to make than regular features. Its great popularity, however, repaid the investment. Jahiliyya selects a child or youth from a tribal, relatively primitive background and simulates divine inspiration through a mixture of high technology, psychoactive drugs and hypnotic programming. The show then follows the adventures of their newly minted prophet for the rest of the season, occasionally providing miracles or prophecy the plot requires.
A typical season explores the life and enviropnment of the candidate for the first two oer three episodes before inducing prophecy. The remainder of the season is dedicated to the birth of the new religion.
Jahiliyya
Season 1 (2005) followed the misadventures of a 13-year-old Yanaoma girl in the Rio Xingu reservation. Filming began in 2003, but the format proved more time-intensive than expected.
Season 2 (2006) selected a KhoiKhoi boy of 14, but had to abandon the experiment when he was threatened with death and expelled from the tribe. They followed his adventures in the desert, providing miraculous suirvival aids.
Season 3 (2007) featured a Pushtu boy from Pakistan's NWFP. The candidate was killed.
Season 4 will depart from the established mould by selecting a 15-year-old member of an urban gang in Mumbai.
Season 5 is advertised as featuring a Naga girl. Early preview trailers suggest she may suffer a form of ordeal.
NapoleonXIV
Banned
Mr Wizard Blows Things Up
The Adventures of Sweet Little Sally and Big Uncle Phil
Playing With the Lawnmower or Fort Refrigerator
The Adventures of Sweet Little Sally and Big Uncle Phil
Playing With the Lawnmower or Fort Refrigerator
Baby Transformers - Trying to get a large portion of the under-age TV demographic, join Boptimus and his Autotots as they take on Megabully and his Deceptibrats for control of the Cybertronian Nursery Playground.
brought to you in the same AMAZING style as "Transformers Animated."
Jaws: The Animated Series - Join Jaws and his happy ocean friends (Billy the Grouper, Alice the Eel, and Greggory the Barracuda) as they try to stop over-fishing, pollution, and other hazards to the ocean. Each episode ends with Jaws giving a lecture to a group of children about ocean safety.
It's once again safe to go back into the water.
Captain Planet Returns!! - Taking place ten years after the original series, rampant pollution (and evil white people) have brought the world to the brink of ecological destruction. It is now up to a new, and even more multicultural, group of Planeteers to once again summon the Earth's Greatest Champion.... Captain Planet!!!!
*shivers* I can't go on....
brought to you in the same AMAZING style as "Transformers Animated."
Jaws: The Animated Series - Join Jaws and his happy ocean friends (Billy the Grouper, Alice the Eel, and Greggory the Barracuda) as they try to stop over-fishing, pollution, and other hazards to the ocean. Each episode ends with Jaws giving a lecture to a group of children about ocean safety.
It's once again safe to go back into the water.
Captain Planet Returns!! - Taking place ten years after the original series, rampant pollution (and evil white people) have brought the world to the brink of ecological destruction. It is now up to a new, and even more multicultural, group of Planeteers to once again summon the Earth's Greatest Champion.... Captain Planet!!!!
*shivers* I can't go on....
Mummy and Daddy wont live forever...
-In association with Insuro-corp.
Children's show telling cautionary tales of how your parents might perish, and why life insurance is only way to save yourself. Aimed at the 4-8 age group, and covers such topics as house fires, car crashes, shark attacks and infectous disease.
Captain Progress
The oil companies hit back at Captain Planet.
In this show 'Captain Progress' teaches kids how the evil "Greenies"; four-foot tall scaly creatures with large, sharp teeth and an endless lust to terrorise children, are nothing to be scared of, if you make the right choices in life (ie voting for legislation that destroys the Greenie 'hideouts'- national parks and wildlife reserves).
-In association with Insuro-corp.
Children's show telling cautionary tales of how your parents might perish, and why life insurance is only way to save yourself. Aimed at the 4-8 age group, and covers such topics as house fires, car crashes, shark attacks and infectous disease.
Captain Progress
The oil companies hit back at Captain Planet.
In this show 'Captain Progress' teaches kids how the evil "Greenies"; four-foot tall scaly creatures with large, sharp teeth and an endless lust to terrorise children, are nothing to be scared of, if you make the right choices in life (ie voting for legislation that destroys the Greenie 'hideouts'- national parks and wildlife reserves).
Schoolhouse Rock: A series on the economy and philosophy aimed at children. Written, directed, and produced by Ayn Rand.
The Bible by Dr Seus.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_hEwxglKD8
Fred Phelps Stars in Phantasm digging up gay graves.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_hEwxglKD8
Fred Phelps Stars in Phantasm digging up gay graves.
Is this "undisguised greed" bit really true? Rowling's favourite character, a crazed stalker? Hmm. Wonder what that says about her...
I know this is a bit late, but I came up with this relatively recently.
How come Snape is the one always bashed as a crazed stalker? James Potter was the one who was actually violent (beating up Snape, who was Lily's friend at the time, and telling her he'd stop if she'd go out with him).
Snape had his issues as a young man, but the only time we see him getting violent (slashing James with Sectumsempra) was in self-defense.